Hidden Objects?

I have heard it said that my office looks like a picture of one of those Hidden Object games. And they aren't wrong.

I am one of those people who has trouble throwing things away. I will donate. I will refurbish, recycle, renew and reuse. But unless it's trash, I won't trash it. So consequently things stack up sometimes.

To be honest, my whole house is a bit like that. Overfilled. Cluttered. Filled to the brim.

Make no mistake though, it is organized, regardless of how some people might view it. It is clean. It is when things get out of place that I start getting antsy.

If I have so many things that I cannot find a place for things then it is time to get rid of some things, one way or another. However cluttered my house, or my office, might be, everything has to have a place and be in it's place when not being used.

This is where anxiety starts to kick in for me. If I put something in a certain place and decide it will live there I get all cranky if it gets put somewhere else by someone else.

I realize that I have allowed certain shelves to get overcrowded, and that I do have a bit of room on the really high shelves up there for a couple things but I cannot reach those shelves up there so I cram the object in the lower shelf for my own convenience.

Yes this means everything on that shelf has to be put back exactly the way it was when it was taken out because the arrangement won't allow for it any other way in the overcrowding that exists. Stacking a cup on top a bowl is simply not acceptable.

The remedy for this overcrowding is to take out some of the things that are not truly needed every day. Of course. Simple. But not really easy. There is the nagging voice in the back of the head saying "you will need that someday down the line".

A proper response to that nagging voice would be "So, if and when I need that thing I will buy one of those".

That is not something I can say to myself or anyone else. Having spent so much of my life in poverty or just plain poor, it is ingrained in me to hang on to anything that is still usable because it costs money to replace things, so never throw anything away that you might need at some point.

Yes, I realize that is not doing me any favors to continue like that. But again, I need to emphasize that my home is comfortable, clean, and organized, it is just stuffed.

Why am I bringing this up? Why is this on my mind? Why am I feeling like I need to deal with this at this time?

Don't laugh, but I think it's in anticipation of Spring Cleaning. I'm serious. I have cleaned an empty house before so I know that it is soooooo much easier when there are fewer things to have to pick up and dust under, or slide away to mop under, or take everything out so that you can scrub properly.

And there lies my dilemma. Fighting anxiety over things not where they should be (I am almost OCD over that), fighting anxiety over things not being as clean and tidy as I prefer them to be, and fighting anxiety over not being able to acquire something I need or will need in the future because of that need to hold back.

Sounds like I am suffering a great deal of anxiety, but actually I am not. I take these things in stride. I notice the anxiety and then little by little do something about it. I do not allow myself to stew over these things. I know better than that.

I've talked about this before.

Not along ago I blogged over tackling things in my office and getting stuff up off the floor where boxes were getting stacked up. It happened and I will probably do it again soon.

So I look forward to Spring because by then I will have donated those clothes I packed in a box (some brand new, never worn, still have tags on them) and that box will be gone from my bedroom floor.

By then I will have tidied up the kitchen shelves and tossed or donated items I can live without.

So - for now, a good cup of hot tea and breakfast to look forward to this morning while playing the Hidden Object game. Ya never know what you might find when you start cleaning.